into a world I used to know
wrenching and squeezing
struggle and pain
voices and faces and light
around me
so familiar
yet so new
and strange
I hear my own cries
but
I'm not sure why
I want to go back
to what was familiar and safe
but
there is no back
no way
to retrace
my steps across the path I've come
and
if I could get back
the place that held me
is gone
I can no longer be there.
I must be here.
(Gen.3:23-24)
~
I'm afraid
of what was once so familiar
a painting I knew
now tilted
I don't want to be the same
and yet
it's so hard to go back changed.
The old places
don't recognize me
don't accept
or reject
the familiar
no comfort
stabs, slices
regret
over the old loss
over the new
I have too many homes
or no homes...
Or
One home.
One home that I carry within me
One home that I have not yet seen
One home
in You
You
in me.
(Col. 3:3)(John 14:3)
~
coming back
to what cost so much to leave
after being so long away
after being so changed
by the path
by the lands
thru which the path
has wound
I want to go back
to that place
but it
and me
no longer exist
as then.
I come back
going forth
into a new land
so similar to
where I have been
so different
from anything I've ever seen.
with new
and older
eyes
taste
expecting
a new wine
don't look for the old
the old is gone
but the new
is spilling and
running down
fresh and clean and cool
"Behold - I make all things new"
all things new
all things new...
(2 Cor. 5:17)(Rev. 21:5)
Linking up with Velvet Ashes at The Grove where the theme this week is "reEntry"
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Michele, this encapsulates the journey so beautifully. One of my fav lines:
ReplyDeletebut
there is no back
no way
to retrace
Thank you, Amy!
DeleteMichele, this jumped out to me:
ReplyDeletea painting I knew
now tilted
What a description of reentry!
And I'm writing this in my journal:
coming back
to what cost so much to leave
after being so long away
after being so changed
by the path
by the lands
thru which the path
has wound
Isn't it funny, Patty, how the painting is the same and yet it isn't...
Deletewe aren't able to see the painting through the same eyes anymore...
I agree with Amy. There is no way back to the "normal" but oh how often we want it to be a possiblity
ReplyDeleteno way back - only a way forward to a normal that we have never yet known...
DeleteI left a comment earlier, but I guess the internet swallowed it. :-)
ReplyDeleteBut I'm glad because it caused me to come back and read this again. So beautiful, Michele.
"a painting I knew
now tilted"
This perfectly captures the feeling of returning to a "familiar" place.
And this:
"coming back
to what cost so much to leave
after being so long away
after being so changed
by the path
by the lands
thru which the path
has wound"
went into my journal to ponder.
I does look like it swallowed it and then changed its mind again...:-) because your comment is back now.
DeleteI'm not sure what was up with that...but I like that you commented again because you added the phrase "returning to a 'familiar' place" - and I think that's so appropriate here - because so much of the trouble is that what is supposed to be familiar is so "off"