Monday, March 16, 2015

The Real Fast - Mark 2:18-22 Post 2

Chalkboard: Mark 2:18-22 Post 2 (The Real Fast)
Fast? (Mark 2:18) My fast began long ago.  As long as I can remember I have lived under it - I live knowing that something is missing, knowing that something is wrong and never able to fill that gnawing, empty place -
the hole that only You can fill, that place where You should be and are not - 

I try to fill it with other things
But it will not be filled.

I fast.  I try to abstain from filling it with other things, so I might remember what I already know
that this place holds only You
and only You can fill it
the abyss, this place in me - now empty - that, in the end, must be once more filled by You
or else will swallow me completely, 
I, myself, cast into it - my own abyss - forever drowning in my own emptiness
without You.

But You will fill it.
Even now You fill it a little - a promise, a taste - just enough for me to glimpse what it might be like - what it WILL be like - though it is beyond me to really imagine being without this hole - to imagine being whole  -
free of the emptiness...
To imagine what it would be to be filled completely with You.

You give me a taste (Mark 14:22-25)
(Taste and see that I am good)(Ps. 34:8)
and I taste, and I know 
it's true.

And so
I eat
and I fast.

But One Day, 
You will fill this space completely
(Your feast spread before me)
And as my empty places are at last filled
this fast will forever end
As You fill me
with Yourself.


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