Wednesday, October 12, 2016

What I Desire

"Whom have I in heaven but You
and earth has nothing I desire besides You..." (Ps. 73:25)

But I seem to desire so many things
on the surface
and who knows what
else
underneath
in those

Deep
Dark
Hidden places
Where even I
am afraid to look.

Afraid 
to peek over the edge
Afraid
I might lose my grip and
fall in
Plunging down
Down 
Into a place
I have no hope of being able to climb out of.

I fear my own desires.
I fear what they are.
I fear what they mean.

But You say
There are treasures there
in the darkness
Riches stored
in secret places

And You will give them...

Can there really be treasures down there?
Riches -
in those dark places?

I peep over the edge...
and wonder...

Can it be
If I let myself fall in
I will find
Among the darkness
What is truly worth finding?

Could it be
I will find...

You?

Peering over
I see 
nothing
but darkness
a shadowy pit
from which there is no escape


But You say
"I will go before you
I will level the mountains"

Do I dare?

Let go
Let myself 
fall in
Discover
what my desires 
really are
Believing 
YOU
can level the mountains
make a way out of any pit
shine a light into any darkness

even my darkness

Believing 

You

are waiting
to do what You have promised
to give treasures
in 
-from-
the darkness....

...so that I may know
that You
are the Lord
my God.
                   - (Isaiah 45:2-3)

          "...Whom have I in heaven but You
          and earth has nothing I desire besides You..."   (Ps. 73:25)

 
Linking up with Velvet Ashes at The Grove where the theme this week is "Desire"

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Friday, July 8, 2016

Colorful

Colors - Colorful  brokenbreadandsmallfish.com
You created 
the world 
with 
color
various
vibrant
multi-hued
sometimes soft
and all
calling out
alive alive alive
all calling out
glory
to You

if even one 
were missing
the world would be
less

and if I am unable to see them
or
to appreciate them
my world is smaller, too
more dull
but
they are still there
whether I see or not
(what I see
is not even all there is...)

they are still there
shouting glory
to You


You
don't want me 
to ignore
to close my eyes
or
to pretend 
that it's all the same
(it's not)
as if the lights were off

the night is beautiful
but so is the day
and 
the brighter the light
the more varied and vibrant 
the hues
You
are true light

You call me
to exult
to rejoice
in all the differences
the shades 
too multiple to count
(only You know how many)
You want me 
to dance through them
to understand
all these colors
come from You
reflect You
teach me about You

embrace them all
love them all
as they make 
our world
our life
full
complex
RICH
GLORIOUS
You
all our colors
are in You
You
are full of color, too.  


Linking up with Velvet Ashes at The Grove where the theme this week is "Colorful"

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Friday, July 1, 2016

Read? Yes, Read - But....

Read?
Yes, 
but 
I've been reading 
too much lately -
I think
or 
not enough
of the right thing
or maybe just
not enough
for the right reason
or 


not enough 
with You

I am just escaping (am I?)
filling my emptiness
with more emptiness
and hoping to be filled
hoping to find life 
in the words and phrases
but 
there is no life here
without You
and  
Only You 
can fill me. 


You do not say not to read.  

Read - yes.
but read
looking for You

in the words
in the story

expecting You
to speak

through
or about 
what I read
discussing it all with You
(our own little book club)

Read? 
yes, read.
but read
with You.


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Thursday, June 23, 2016

You Are My Music

Music
finds me 
and 
encourages me
in dark places
lifts me 
up
comforts
mourns
or exhilarates 
with me
in high places
in low

but
without You
music 
is empty


With You
flowing through
filling
lifting
breathing
sighing
Music..

You
are my music
You
are the song I sing
when I sing
of 
the color of the sky
or
flowers

strong
fragile
temptations
triumphs
death
and life

It's always
You

the heartbeat
the rhythm
inspiring 
driving
breathing life
and dying

It is You
in the music
that brings joy to my heart
makes
the pain of the song
bearable
beautiful
You
redeem
every note
every pulse
every sudden expectant silence

rising and falling
steady and constant
crescendo 
and fading

surrounding 
filling
all I do
(my background music is You)

filling me
making my life
all life
music

You.  
 


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Sunday, June 19, 2016

Wait

Wait (poem) brokenbreadandsmallfish.com
I know
I wait
for something
but
I can't remember
what

and expectation
and hope
it seems
have died within me

because how do I hope
and how do I expect
when I have forgotten
what I'm waiting for...?

for tomorrow...?
or
am I waiting 
for too many things?
and my pieces of hope
and expectation
are too divided
to mean anything.... 

splintered desires
are small and wan
and lukewarm
their fires
flicker
and blink out

and my soul softly mourns

because 
IT 
hasn't forgotten
while I was busy spreading my hopes
around
IT
steadily remembers
where my hope is found
reminds me now
that I wait
for One Thing Only 

Bring those
scattered sticks and torches
those embers
about to go out
pile them together
into one great heap
One fire
One flame
leaping up anew
blazing higher
reaching
believing
expecting
I have energy and resources
Only for this
but in this
each piece is lit
I wait
All of me
Only
for You.


Linking up with Velvet Ashes at The Grove where the theme this week is "Wait"

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